Comments on: Homeschooling Socialization: The Greatest Conflict of Homeschooling

By: Brian

Brian — Mon, 25 Jan 2010 20:29:38 +0000

This group of respondents is precisely correct. I can add little more to what has already been said. It warms my heart to hear others that “get it”. The quality and character of children being produced by our public school system is unacceptable, which is largely a result of “socialization” in public schools.

By: FreeToBe

FreeToBe — Mon, 25 Jan 2010 05:11:10 +0000

Socialization in Public School? Do you mean “socializing”? Actually, neither of those happen well in PS. Socialization is learning to get along in society. It is “please” and “thank you”, “wait your turn”, “share with others”. It is speaking respectfully to others and having social graces. This is actualy NOT best done in an age-graded situation. Socialization skills are poorly learned in a mass environment. Would you want your child’s peers, who are as ignorant as your child, to be doing the teaching? Because that’s what you get in a mass situation. The teacher cannot teach these things well to that many at a time. They are best learned at home and in multi-age situations….they are best learned in the Real World….which school is NOT!

By: Angela

Angela — Mon, 25 Jan 2010 03:36:27 +0000

I am interested in what studies or evidence is being referred to when stating that socialization is the major conflict of homeschooling. I have never heard of an actual homeschooler, parent or student, express any indication that socialization is any problem at all. In fact, my son wonders how public school kids get ANY socialization. He can’t wait for them to come home so he can hang out with them, but then they have hours of homework, are grounded for less than straight A’s, or are simply too tired and stressed from their school day. Of course, then, there’s the question of whether or not the socialization they get in school is HEALTHY socialization. if your child is being beat up, bullied, offered drugs, felt-up…all, mind you, before they are old enough and experienced enough to know how to handle these pressures…is not the best socialization that in which the parent has supervision of? I’m always amazed when an otherwise sane loving parent thinks it is in his/her childs best interest to be thrown to the dogs in order to learn how to fight them off. Yet, when it is un-school related do everything in their power to protect their children, even well into adulthood. I agree that having social contacts and plenty of time to be with others their own age group is VERY important for kids of all ages, even for adults! Any parent would be negligent if they failed to help their children find suitable friends and to provide generous amounts of time for socializing. “Socialization”, however, by its very definition is different from socializing. It is fitting ones self to the mold of the group. Peer pressure ring a bell? Who in their right mind thinks that peer-pressure/socialization has positive effects on children?! It is a fact, supported by ample evidence, that homeschoolers do not generally suffer from lack of socializing. The opposite tends to be true, however. We often have to cut back on the play dates and group meets so that we can have enough time to actually fit in the academics! And they still consistently score well above their traditional school counterparts across the board!

By: Jay

Jay — Sat, 23 Jan 2010 21:14:44 +0000

The author is mistaken–homeschool socialization is typically much more appropriate for children than school socialization. A child who is (to all intents and purposes) locked in a room for 6 hours a day with 20 or 30 other children whose only commonality is age has many fewer opportunities for socializing than a child who accompanies a parent shopping (most supermarkets, department stores, etc. *do* have other customers as well as store employees–a fact that the author seems to be unaware of!), to give only one example. Moreover, the type of socialization is of much higher quality. How important is the “skill” of knowing how to get along with large numbers of people–all of whom are within 9 months of your own age? An adult whose spouse and 3 closest friends are all the same age as her/him would be an extremely rare occurance, not to even mention all the other people one interacts with on a single day!

By: Debbie

Debbie — Sat, 23 Jan 2010 13:39:09 +0000

“depriving them of the social development offered by public schools. After all, it would be difficult for a child to develop social skills when they are not given the opportunity to interact with other children.”
This quote shows the ignorance of the whole topic of “socialization.” Be careful what you profess as “truth” when it come to socialized children. As a matter of fact, I have discovered through my experience that children who are around people of all ages are much more “socialized.” They tend to be more mature. Interestingly though, the word ‘socialized’ does not need to be simulataneous with ‘same-age.’ If you have yet to witness ‘same-age socialized’ groups, you are in for a treat. I would much rather have my children socialized with many age groups, not just their own age!

By: OFelixCulpa

OFelixCulpa — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 16:32:10 +0000

Certainly not all ‘opportunities for socialization’ are created equal. The quality of various avenues for socialization will range from excellent to destructive; what evidence leads you to conclude that the socialization offered by public schools is universally beneficial? It could just as easily be argued that the socialization offered by public schools is a destructive influence from which we should protect our children.

By: Cathy Alger

Cathy Alger — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 15:51:19 +0000

Spend some time with many kids “socialized” by the public schools. Then, spend some time with homeschooled teens. If you do, you’ll have to re-write this article from another viewpoint.

By: Kaylene

Kaylene — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 21:31:26 +0000

Homeschooled children aren’t at all deprived of socialization opportunities. There are plenty of opportunities to form friendships with other homeschooled children, neighborhood children, relatives, and interest groups. As a homeschooling family, we don’t keep our children hidden away in the house all day and night. Contrary to the beliefs stated in this article, our homeschooled children do get out of the house to participate — and socialize — in church activities, Boy Scouts, youth sports and community events. They have close friends, go to movies, attend concerts, hang out, and have fun with other children. Public schools aren’t the only place where children can meet and socialize!

A huge benefit of homeschooling is the lack of “socialization opportunities” other children are forced to endure in a public school setting. Thankfully, my children get to miss the bullying, teasing, exclusion, social cliques and rejection that occurs constantly in public schools. My children don’t have to fight the popularity wars or endure the jock culture and they don’t miss it one bit!

Socialization for homeschooling is different than socialization done in public schools, but, homeschooled kids learn more acceptance, understanding, and respect for others in the homeschooling community than they ever would learn in a public school setting.

By: Tasha

Tasha — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 21:01:04 +0000

I wouldn’t call it the greatest conflict of homeschooling. I would call it the greatest conflict between those who are for homeschooling and those who are against it. From what I’ve seen that’s usually the biggest concern for those wanting to home school, and those who are already homeschooling. We don’t just bring our kids home and keep them inside the house 24hrs a day except for the occasional shopping trip or church meeting. Yes, the socialization differs between home school and public school, but my children don’t need to be bullied or teased to learn social skills. They still have to learn to get along with siblings, neighbors, and friends just like they would in a public school. After seeing the difference in my daughter’s confidence and self-esteem I just couldn’t justify sending her back to watch it plummet all over again. That to me is a huge advantage of the socialization offered from homeschooling.

By: Jane

Jane — Wed, 20 Jan 2010 20:36:56 +0000

Socialization is only a conflict when parents haven’t done their research before starting down that path. There are so many constructive activities that children can be involved in that provide socialization with a more select group of peers than can be found simply by sending them to formal school.

Another option for parents just starting out is “virtual public school”. It provides a structured learning system that can be adapted to fit the individual child, and without the additional cost of purchasing curriculum. Plus most have monthly field trips which provide another avenue of for socialization. Check with your state school board for school districts offering this service, and you can also look at K12.com to see what schools in your area are using their integrated curriculum.